Rats
Wednesday, May 28, 2008 at 11:34PM in broker bill "Nixon or Truman?"
"Who is this?"
"Come on, captain. Nixon or Truman?"
"Jesus, Mell. I thought you were on vacation."
"I am. Aren't you?"
"Couldn't get away."
"Ha. I knew it."
"I don't like this market. I need to be here."
(silence)
"What time is it over there?"
"Here? About noon. Why?"
"Mell, it's like eleven out here. At night. You know you shouldn't call on the house line so late. Kate is gonna be pissed if you wake up the baby."
"Just answer the question and I'll go. Nixon or Truman?"
"Mell, you're not drunk already, are you? You guys pulling a Vegas over there?"
"No way. Just about to have lunch."
(silence)
"Do you think Bush will be remembered as Nixon or Truman?"
"Mell, I should get back to bed."
"'Cause you know all the neocon nut jobs see him as Truman. Maybe even Churchill. They sure love strong leader types, those guys. I never met so many fucking closeted homos than..."
"I give up, Mell. Nixon?"
"No way, captain. Nixon was great for the country. Opened up China, created the EPA, let Kissinger do his thing."
(silence)
"The right answer is Johnson."
"Great, Mell. Can I go now?"
"Johnson destroyed the Democratic Party."
"Mell, please..."
"Bush totally fucked us. Our next chance is the two-ten midterms after Obama's first couple years. The recession will be over by then, but people are gonna be pissed he's not the Second Coming."
"I'm hanging up now, Mell. You have a great vacation, ok?"
"No, wait. I almost forgot."
"What's up?"
"You have to get me a copy of McClellan's book."
"Sure, Mell. Whatever."
"Thanks, captain. You're the best."
"'Night.
"Rats are always jumping off sinking ships."
(silence)
"But at least rats have the brains to jump. What do you call a neocon still too fucking stupid to realize the war was a mistake?"
(silence)
"What do you think, captain?"
(silence)
"Hello?"